Surviving The Zombie Apocalypse On A Budget
We all get so caught up in our zombie apocalypse fantasies that we often forget the importance of money when it comes to fighting off hordes of undead. If you don’t have the money to prepare accordingly for the day the dead walk the earth, then it’s imperative that you know how to survive until you can pry a shotgun from the cold, dead hands of a mutilated corpse. Here are a few tips on how to do so:
- Boarding up windows and doors requires an enormous amount of wood, which you’ll have to acquire in a hurry. Instead of risking the riot at the local hardware store, pull apart a shed or garage for the planks you’ll need. You can even tear apart the treehouse in your neighbours backyard. If their children complain, beat them to a pulp with the wood. A zombie apocalypse isn’t a place to make friends.
- It will be incredibly difficult if your kitchen isn’t fully stocked, so while eating a family member isn’t something you would normally do, drastic times call for drastic measures. Eat your fattest family member first. Work your way through your loved ones in descending order and hope you’re the smallest. If there’s ever been a reason to get in shape, it’s the possibility of your parents feasting on your bones.
- You’re not going to start out with an arsenal of weapons and unlimited ammunition to mow down the advancing undead, so you’re going to have to start small. Utilise anything you can afford to break over the head of a zombie, including baseball bats, gardening equipment, pieces of wood, severed limbs, and that guitar you never learnt to play. Just use anything long and hard… No guys, not that…
R is a man with an existential crisis—he is a zombie. He shuffles through an America destroyed by war, social collapse, and the mindless hunger of his undead comrades, but he craves something more than blood and brains. He can speak just a few grunted syllables, but his inner life is deep, full of wonder and longing. He has no memories, no identity, and no pulse, but he has dreams.
After experiencing a teenage boy’s memories while consuming his brain, R makes an unexpected choice that begins a tense, awkward, and strangely sweet relationship with the victim’s human girlfriend. Julie is a blast of color in the dreary and gray landscape that surrounds R. His decision to protect her will transform not only R but also his fellow Dead, and perhaps their whole lifeless world. Scary, funny, and surprisingly poignant, Warm Bodies is about being alive, being dead, and the blurry line in between
